He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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