i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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