I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
