She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
