i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i just google imaged poop.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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