Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
