But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize