Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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