Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
