The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize