My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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