Cold hands, warm shart.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize