Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
