I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
