shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
