Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize