I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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