At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
