...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
