she was so not down for the gang bang
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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