That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
