$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize