How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
