I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Dick very happy bro
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize