Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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