WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
