I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
