We named our party play list daddy issues
apparently the secret to your success is patron
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
