How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
