So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
