There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
