How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
