i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
