Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
