We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize