he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
