Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
