My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
