Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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