It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
