She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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