carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
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