3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
