People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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