I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
