the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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