Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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