No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
