why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize