we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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