that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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