oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
